I Hate My Bike

So if you've read this long enough, you know that my bike was stolen last year from a bike rack at Brown when someone cut my wirelock and made off with my bike. After that, I went to the Providence Bike Hub or something like that and looked for a bike. It was basically the only place I could conveniently get a bike in Providence; anything else I'd have to take a bus to, and get a lock and lock it to the bus, or something, I didn't even know, and it didn't seem worth it.

All the bikes in Providence were EXTREMELY expensive, I guess going off the convenience argument I just made and the fact that it was a college campus. So when I saw some mountain bikes in there for like $450, I decided to just ask for the cheapest bike in there and see if I liked it. It was a one-speed commuter bike for like $150 and it was a complete piece of crap, so I said no, and looked at the next one up. It was a seven-speed commuter bike for about $225, and I figured it seemed okay, so I took that one and got a lock for it.

I hate that bike. I think it is possibly the second worst bike in the world, second only to the $150 bike I didn't buy, and possibly the Segway Scooter (not a bike, shut up). It's like 17 feet tall and whenever I want to get on it, I have to put the pedals in the right position so I can lean it to the left, put my right leg over it onto the pedal, and then straighten and pedal down simultaneously. The wheels are also so big that they don't fit into like any bike rack ever, which is seriously annoying. The shocks also suck, so a pebble in the road is like a dagger into my crotch. Sorry for the visual, but that's how it is. Also, the chain pops off ALL THE TIME. Like, ALL THE TIME. Generally at least once a week. And every time it does, you have to get your hands all greasy and disgusting to put it back one.

Earlier this week I was rushing from my Insurance 301 class to Willard to register some people to vote in a classroom, and I went down a curb, and my chain popped off. So I was a 3 minute bikeride or a 10 minute walk away from a place I needed to be in about 10 minutes. And I hated my bike. I stopped and put the chain back on and washed my hands of the grease furiously before I went to the classroom. I think someone from Gov. School also texted me saying that my bike was a piece of crap, but I'm not sure.

Well anyway. Today I was riding from my Stat class to my Econ class, which is maybe a ten minute walk or a three minute ride, and I was late because I stayed to talk to my Stat teacher about whether or not I should keep the class or just keep Stat 414 and then take 462 or 501. Sometime when I was going West on Pollock road to get to my class, my bike's chain mechanism just shattered. I don't even know how it happened. I don't think I shifted gears or even went over a bump. The things that hold the chain in place laterally came off and the chain fell to the pedals and it was a nightmare and I was late for class and missed some extra credit because my bike sucks.

After class, I took my bike to the shop on College Ave (after walking it down five flights of stairs because I'm an idiot), walked it into the shop, and asked the keeper, "Is this bike totalled? Is it totally broken? Please say yes." And he looked down at it and said, "No... unfortunately it's not as bad as it looks. You don't even need those. You want me to take them off?" I said no, it's fine, I would take them off myself, but he took off the easy on (outside of the chain) and put the chain back on. He also put it on the holder to check if anything was bent, and noticed my brake pads are worn. I said that's great, hopefully they'll explode soon so I can get a new bike. I told him I'd be back in November when my bike broke and thanked him for his help, and hated my bike a whole lot, and wished it would break.

Peace out.