Customers 3

A week or two ago, three teenage girls came into the store. One of them was wearing a sort of showy blue top and short jean skirt. She was probably like fifteen, but maybe a bit older. She asked for gum, and for some reason I thought there was something a little bit strange about her. I suppose it was the ukelele that she brought into the store.

She and her friends ended up just getting some stuff for the movies. As I was ringing her up, I asked her, "Are you taking that ukelele to the movie theater?" And in a sort of airy and detached voice, she answered, "Yeah, I take it everywhere I go...!" I didn't really know what to make of the response. I really was curious if she was taking that ukelele to the movie theater and why, but I didn't feel like pushing to find out. She also thanked for me for noticing that it was a ukelele and not a miniature guitar, which apparently is a common mistake.

I suppose I was just a little thrown off by the whole thing. I mean, come on. A ukelele.

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Just about at close last night, the door opened and I heard some barely pubescent girls screaming "HAHA I LOVE YOU" to someone outside. They walked up to the counter and basically accosted me right away, which is really annoying. I forget what things they asked me, but one of them said, "You're kinda cute," to which I didn't respond, beacuse they were scabby teen hos [ouch] and probably the age of like, Abby's sister. And dressed really skanky. And just overall very obnoxious and sort of skeeving me out. Then they loudly joked, "LET'S GO GET SOME CONDAMS." I think they asked me if we sold condams, so I pointed them in the direction of them. I didn't think they would get them since they were like, 13.

A couple minutes later they came back. Three of them were holding a Durex Pleasure Pack in their hands, and they bought them and asked me to keep the receipts. "No receipts, please," one said. They asked me if I smoked because I was trying to remove the safety from one of the lighters, but I said no. They asked me if I would serve them, and I said no. To be honest, I might have if they weren't obnoxious scabby teen hos, but as it were, they were obnoxious scabby teen hos, and I'm not bending the rules for you if I don't like you.

They proceeded to sit outside and accost passerbys for a while. I heard someone shout at them later, "GO BACK TO HIGH SCHOOL." I'm pretty sure they were in middle school, so that must have been a huge boost for their ego. Oh well. At least they're having safe sex.

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A man came in with two rolls of 24 exposure 35mm film. Every one of the 48 pictures was the same birdhouse and a few birds. He said he and his wife sat there for hours taking pictures of it.

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Around close last night, a guy and a girl came in and looked around. A minute later another guy, wearing a white shirt and jeans, asked me where the pregnancy tests were, assuring me "It's not for me." It turned out he was with the guy and girl that had come in before... they might have come together but I missed that. He had blonde hair and the other two had dark hair, all probably about 23 years old.

A minute or two later they came back with a pregnancy test and bought it. They were joking that it "Wasn't for them," or something like that. I swept it under the desk to deactive any security devices that might be on it, since things like that are often stolen. I told them why I was doing that and they were like, "People steal these?" So I said, "Yeah, basically anything to do with sex.... so like, pregnancy tests, condoms, lubricant..." They all thought that was pretty funny, and I added, "Yeah, and the yeast infection stuff... basically anything with those three letters." To which the black haired guy added, "Haha, V-A-G."

After they paid, they asked, "Do you have a bathroom?" ((o_O)) Yes, we do. So I asked Dave to take them to the bathroom, and he came back a couple minutes later.

"Dude, Sarah is so skeeved out. The girl was like 'Man, this is really dirty,' but then all three of them went into the bathroom to use the test. Why do you need to do that?"

I thought it was hilarious, that they would go into the bathroom with her as she peed on a stick. They came out a couple minutes later, all very exited, and somehow they told us that she was negative. As they walked out, very excited, she said to Dave, "Have a nice night!" And then she said to me, "And you! WRAP IT UP!! Don't get the HIV!"

Peace out.